Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Randomize
