I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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