For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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