Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
