Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
You need Xanax blowdarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize