I feel like abortions should bother me more
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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