The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
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You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
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YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
I hate when you're right.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite