I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
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hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
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My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.