i don't plan on having that self control this summer
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
accomplished twins. life is a go
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?