then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize