real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
We are two peas in an std pod
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
