Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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