Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
