After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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