she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
