Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Randomize
