Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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