Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?