he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
