I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ass is underappreciated
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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