I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
