if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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