You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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