I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
