Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
