that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.