she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
