Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut