I'm really into asian looking animals
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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