The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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