i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
