More tranny stories later!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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