remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
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We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
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We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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