I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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