I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
i think im in europe. pls send help
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.