Christians are straight up FREAKS
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Randomize
