dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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