He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
