He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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