the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
