i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
