I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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