Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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