just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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