Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
