physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
