Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize