I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
