I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Randomize
