I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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